Fertility update....

Today James and I had a one on one meeting with our fertility doctor, Dr. Phy. I knew this day was coming but you're never really quite prepared for it. I love Dr. Phy and how she is just so honest with us and will not waste our time or our money.

Through out this entire process Dr. Phy has been amazing! She was always so encouraging and would never give up on us. Today, Dr. Phy said the words I was dreading the most...."I can't help you any longer." Our fertility case is a confusing one and takes more technology then Dr. Phy has available.

I knew going in there that we were headed toward IVF. It was a little overwhelming to hear but I already knew. I would love to write what I'm really feeling but today I am really raw to the news and still have to let it sink it.

I know this is not the end of the world but I know how much fertility treatments cost. The one we need is going to be a massive expense. We found this fertility clinic years ago in the Maryland area and it was funny because this is the clinic that Dr. Phy recommended. We have to go through a lot of testing and have a lot of decisions to make.

Tonight I'm sitting here and I am exhausted: emotionally, physically and spiritually. I know I will get past this but I never in my wildest dreams thought that having a baby of my own would be so hard. My heart breaks for James and Farrah. James is such a wonderful father and Farrah would be such a great big sister. So today, yes I'm hurt but tomorrow is a new day. The most important thing you can let us do is grieve. Just listen to us, we know you can't fix it and neither can we but it sure does help to be real with someone!

Thank you to all our family and friends who have covered us in prayers and encouraged us everyday. We don't know the next step but we know our fight for our children is not over!